Let’s get CYNICAL with the meanings of some words beginning with the letter ‘A’

There is some truth in the definitions, I think. LOL

P.S: A Cynic is someone who, when he smells flowers, looks for a coffin.

 

1. ABSTAINER: A person who yields to the temptation of denying himself a pleasure.

Ambrose Bierce

2. ACCOUNTANCY: The closest to hell I’ve ever been.

Chris Blackwell

3. ADAM: The luckiest man in the world – because he had no mother – in – law.

Sholom Aleichem

 

4. ADDRESSES: Items given to us to conceal our whereabouts.

Saki

5. ADOLESCENCE: The period in a kid’s life when parents become difficult.

Ryan O’Neal

The age at which children stop asking questions because they know all the answers   .

Jeanne Howard

People whose job it is to turn on you.

Ron Howard

6. ADULT: One who has ceased to grow vertically but not horizontally

Kevin Goldstein- Jackson

7. ADULTERY: A stimulant to men, but a sedative to women.

Malcolm de Chazal

The application of democracy to love

H.L Mencken

8. ADVERTISING: Legalized lying

G Wells

The cheapest way of selling goods – particularly if they’re worthless.

Sinclait Lewis

The art of making whole lies out of half-truths

Edgar A. Shoaff

9. AGE: Something a woman conceals because a man rarely acts his.

Leopold Fechtner

10. ALCOHOL: A very necessary article. It enables Parliament to do things at eleven at night that no

sane man would do at eleven in the morning.

George Bernard Shaw

A liquid effective for preserving everything – except secrets

Henny Youngman

11. ALCOHOLISM: Not a spectator sport, because eventually the whole family gets to play.

Joyce Rebeta –Burdett

12. ALONE: In bad company

Ambrose Bierce

13. AMATEUR: One who accepts cash rather than cheques

Jack Kelly

14. AMBASSADOR: An honest man sent abroad to lie for the Commonwealth

Sir. Henry Wooton

15. ANTS: Insects that attend picnics for a living.

Kenny Everett

Good citizens – they place group interests first

Clarence Day

16. APOLOGY: The only thing that will allow you to get the last word with a woman

Danny Cummins

17. APPLAUSE: The custom of showing one’s pleasure at beautiful music by immediately following it with ugly noise

Percy Scholes

18. ARMPITS: Parts of the body that lead lives of quiet perspiration

Anon

 

 

 

Credit: The Cynics Dictionary; London: Prion Books Limited; 2000