I read this somewhere, “One of the most loyal gifts in life is a loyal friend”. This is a simple sentence but it triggered deep thoughts in me. Maybe it was because my phone had gone off and I was stuck in the usual traffic between Sankara to Legon. If it wasn’t so, I would have been chatting away.
I cast my mind back to the friends I had made through life. Some had stood the test of time amidst little quarrels and others I had dropped along the line for various reasons. With some, we had just grown apart. It was a beautiful journey down memory lane, reminiscing how we phoned each other to plan meet-ups, what to wear, who to go with and who not to go with. The stories we told our parents to get passes, which route was fastest to use and even where to go.
With time bridges were drawn. Some parents did not approve of some friendships, some were given revelations by pastors that their friends were demons while others changed schools or moved out the town/country and lost touch. There were those who were disloyal and betrayed the trust friends had in them. Some grew envious of each other, created competitions amongst themselves and other unwholesome human behaviours that did not promote cordial living.
As the car moved, my thoughts seemed to move along at its pace-slowly through such friends. The thought of it got me angry and I laughed at myself to still feel bitter about a friend who wrote nasty things about me in her slam book or that friend who dated the boy I told her I liked in J.H.S. The ones that happened more recently, hurt the more, obviously. It felt better when I thought about the ones whom I could still call in times of need, in times of joy and when I needed counsel. The ones who I now call family. No, these ones were not saints and neither was I. Every now and then, we quarreled, we had divergent views, we accused each other of being ‘brown’ or for ‘dawging’ .Those were different from the ones who had been dropped for disloyalty.
As things get tougher and the crave and craze for material things get high, disloyalty has also been on the rise. Moving away from friendships and relationships, some government officials have been disloyal to the State, Pastors to the church and congregants, Staff at their place of work etc. all in the bid to acquire. But think about it, you can acquire all the material things you need through genuine or otherwise means but friendship can only be acquired through trust, love, faithfulness, sacrifice and loyalty. No amount of money can keep a friend dear and near without those traits.
You may think you do not need a friend, but if you have marked an important day in your life without friends and family before, you will know that such days are more beautiful with loved ones. If you have lost a loved one, and had someone to mourn and cheer you up, then you will know that people are important. If you have been in a situation and needed to call someone for help, then you should appreciate the gift of family and friendship .Even if your social media pages are fun, it is because you know and can follow friends or even virtual friends. The world is not an island and we need people; good people to help us go through it.
If you have friends, hold them dear and treat them right. If you haven’t heard or seen them in a while, the weekend is near. Call them or visit them if possible. Let them feel your love. If you have wronged a friend, apologise, mend that relationship. Don’t ask for forgiveness in a tribute. Who knows if they hear? Thankfully, social media has made it easier to find people. Catch up with them. Let’s not forget the queer ones who claim they do not make friends. If you know of any, assist them for they need help. For those who have been disloyal, forgive them if you can. Through it all, cherish relationships and do your best not to ruin them.